Friday, January 15, 2010

Flotsam and Jetsam

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Stodgy Legs Elf was spiraling down into the dark after being clobbered by a large and angry Rhinitiseroseule. She was doing so well with her running when this ferocious-type beast came to plague her life. He came amidst the swirls of PM2.5 particles in the toxic human air that surrounded her faerie home. She had to fashion a mask of witchspyder webs to cover her mouth and nose just to walk outside, and she could not exert much energy without swelling and becoming blue. "I am not a blue faerie by nature", thought Stodgy Legs. "The color does not fit me well."

But in spite of this tragic setback, Stodgy Legs had lost 5.5 lbs of her Stodgy self in the past two weeks. "I will not miss that part of me", said Stodgy Legs Elf.

Friday, January 1, 2010

Of Herbs and Stewed Rabbit

Stodgy Legs Elf was ready to get in touch with the Earth through food. She had always loved the herbs and roots and leafy greens and whole grains of the Earth. This year she decided that it was time to rid herself of polished grains and foods that had been processed and packaged for humans in a hurry. "Life is too beautiful and precious and the Earth is too magnificent for me to rush by it's treasures", thought Stodgy.

Stodgy Legs had decided to cut her portions down, and to eat whole and natural foods again. Every time she did this, she felt more energy and health. "Really, the rewards are so great that it makes little sense to do otherwise", she told herself.